And there you go, it's been done

I've lost the will to allow myself happiness anymore.

I don't deserve that, I mean that's why the waves of doubt have returned?

To torture me? Is that it?

It's getting too much for me, and it's the frustration that guides it.

I don't know what to do anymore, I can't force it down any longer.

I can't pretend to be blissfully content. I just can't. 

I need to know why the tables have flipped. Why? What have I done? 

What can I do to solve it? 

I've got to know! 

Please. 

Stupid Nicole.
Hate how she decided to cut her hair.
Hate where she lives.
Hate how she walks.
Hate how she looks in her uniform.
Hate how she brings herself across.
Hate the way she speaks.
Hate how she dances.
Hate her braces.
Hate how attached she gets to everyone.
Hate how she cries all the fucking time for no apparent reason.
Hate her damn eczema and skin.
Hate her body.
Hate her face.
Hate her voice.
Hate the way she takes pictures.
Hate her bruises.
Hate her knees.
Hate how she is when she's with her friends. 
Hate how paranoid she is about everything.
Hate how many times she said sorry.
Hate what she's becoming.
Hate how she is in school. 
Hate everything about her.

Stupid cunt. Nicole.

I have nothing to say really. I guess it's back. And I fucking hate it.